Why is no one friends with Dracula? Because he’s a pain in the neck.

Wanna hear two short jokes and a long joke? Joke, joke, joooooooooooooke.

What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common? The same middle name.

I bought the world’s worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it’s terrible.

Why aren’t koalas actual bears? They don’t have the right koalafications.